- The Concept of Presence is not only for coaches, we consider it if we
are teachers, parents, leaders in organizations if we are working with other
people in the world, because presence is a people skill concept.
-
The basis of presence are: being mindful, take a pause so you can be
able to handle with whatever situation you face in your life, in this way you
will be able to think in another way and help in the solutions to the problem
in front of you, and it can be applied in many ways of life especially if we
train ourselves to do it.
-
LISTE, ASK & CONNECT are the 3 parts & pieces of our roles as
coaches, even in our family we can do it; listen with curiosity, ask questions
that engage further understanding, and connect with others in helping them
understand and experience the feelings that they are having.
-
The Macro Version of this Model is: Know Yourself, Choose Yourself, Give
Yourself.
-
Give Yourself means increasing
self-awareness by knowing who you are, becoming more intentional, doing what
you mean by being filled with purpose in yourself.
Experiences of Presence (helping a friend, a piece of art that moved
you…)are moments that stay
with you, and it’s a simple definition of Presence.
When we are present we are creating and co – creating our relationship
with others, when we are present with others, then this will let others be
present with us, it’s contagious.
When we learn something new, we are often distracted by techniques&
processes, the way you can practice this work is by building your awareness of
how to show up, how you walk into the room, what qualities are you bringing in
those situations, what feelings you want to be present in order to build that
present relationship with your friends, family member, child.
Ingredients of Presence :
-
Being yourself .
-
Deep listening: listen not just to words but to the intonations, the
facial expressions, tones, body language
-
Openness: free from judgement, to be open to the perspectives of others.
-
Authenticity: are you as a coach congruent? Does your outside behavior
match your internal behavior?
-
Emotionally free: are you emotionally open & free? Can you walk in
all the feelings in the room? Can you
welcome the feelings of sadness without trying to change or manage them? Can
you validate those feelings? To use the emotional energy that the clients
expresses.
-
Creativity: are you finding creative ways to let them navigate their own
emotional landscape? Are you expanding on the clients wisdom? Because it’s the
clients wisdom that we want to flow with.
-
Agility: To be quick on your feet in many situations especially in
coaching. To be fully present with the clients.
-
Resilience: Fall down 8 times, gets up the ninth. Can you be resilient
by admitting your human flaws?
Presence becomes the foundation of coaching, because everything we need
to know is in the moment.
Dug selzbi says that there are 3 doorways to the presence: MIND BODY
HEART .
When we practice associated with these areas, we become mastering in
each of these states, and the experiences of presence become more
possible.
How can we always manage to be present in every situation we face? Are we able to always do and have this recipe of presence in our heads, personality, everyday situations?
Is it really contagious? How? Can we teach it to our friends, families, relations? Or it's going to be spread whenever they see you act and behave based on this presence?
